After a month of unplesant events, today I thought to put some thing in to my blog. It's 8'o clock in the morning & I am listenng the song of CLASSIC bollywood movie Hum Dono. I am feeling it very close to my condition.
let's I discuss, what happened in this one month. First of all being on bench in IT industry is like that you have a body without soul, which i was since 2 months. But thank to the GOD that He put me in project. After that there was result of CAT. Which put me in the situation of Na Ghar Ke Na Ghat ke. What a idiot I am, I put a complete 2 years for CAT & got only 75 percentile this year. I was very angry when I saw it, but neglected it. I told to my self that ALL IZZ WELL. But ALL IZZ NOT WELL boss..I need to think about it. Why every time i face this situtaion? Am I so unlucky? I put my 100 % this year, I was damm sure that Atleast I will crack CAT with 90 %. But when Result came I fussed. Since 2 years I am watching the movie of my life, & I found that I failed in every front where I put my heart & soul. I failed to switch job which I desperately needed since 1 year. I failed in CAT twice, XAT, JMET so severly that any one who is preparing for these exams since 2 years, they will atleast crack these with good percentile. But my plane of dreams crashed so badly.
The situation is like that KABHI KHUD PE KABHI HALAT PE RONA AYA, BAT NIKLI TO HAR BAT PE RONA AYA. In office there is no such reward for work, A junior girl who don't know any thing about functional & technical things, she deputed as a functional person in project, senior to me.
Now I am Listening Main Zindagi Ka Sath nibhata chala gaya, Har fikra ko dhuyen me udata chala gaya. I feel the pain of this song. Really in every front, I have the same attitude. MAN KA HUA TO ACCHAA AUR NA HUA TO AUR BHI ACCHAA. But now it's enough. Why every time me for these bad lucks? Soory God asking this question? I know that When I was selected in TCS, I never questioned Why me?, When you saved my job in bloddy recession, I never Questione WHy me? and everytime when I didn't deserve the things & you put it in to plate, I didn't say Why me? but this time why I am saying this word? I know God you are feeling very angry over me that I am very selfish person. But you know, I am sequentially failing. Every second I change my gameplan of life. Some time thinking about to switch jobs, then some time to keep my self alive in Job, some time for better future career switch my self to MBA exams. I am tired boss, Please help me to figure out where I will put my self for good life. I haven't any option, again this year I will prepare for MBA & put my 100%. Please God come to me & told me that What is my mistake? Is everytime the dedication from my side is Below Par Line? Whether my preparations are not up to the mark? whether I am not having those line in to my hand to achieve, what I want? So that I will head myself to the things where I will get success.
But no problem boss,I know that I will surely bounce back. I will overcome these hardships again. But how & when I don't know. But I will....
I have the the courage to fight with the situation, to walk across the faliures...& I won't let me back in the mid way of the journey, I will complete it.......That's my indomitable Spirit....................
Lakshya Ko Har Hal Me Pana hai.........
